Here is the funkey Codex!
Boggle
The Boggle are eating machines. Their highly advanced digestive systems can process anything from the most poisonous spiders to raw iron.
The Boggle bodies break down any material they eat. They sweat out a pure, sweet substance similar to honey that is the staple of all Funkeydiets. Nothing beats a peanut butter and Boggle sweat sandwich with a warm glass of purple milk.
The Boggle are an essential part of the Funkeysociety as the recyclers of all waste, with zero harm to the Funkey environment.
Don’t be scared by their hideous appearance, the Boggle wouldn’t hurt a fly… unless it gets too close to their mouth – then they might take a nibble.
Bones
The Bones are what they are. They don’t hide their feelings or thoughts from anyone. But it’s easy to get under their skin making them often grumpy and disgruntled.
The phrase “You Old Bucket of Bones” has come to mean someone who is in a bad mood and if you “Have a Bone to Pick” you are upset about something. But make no bones about it, they still have fun.
Most doctors in Terrapinia are Bones and they are accomplished at playing piano. Their favorite past time is fishing, although their catch is often just skin and bones.
Deuce
Fond of all things hip and trendy, the Deuce set the standards for cutting edge culture. In fact, the phrase “What the Deuce” means what’s hot and “That’s Deuce” means that’s cool.
The Deuce love music but not that snooty, high culture opera that the Glub sing. The Deuce like Rockabilly and anything that’s fast and you can dance to.
The Deuce are notorious pranksters. The most famous prank was when they tricked the Glubinto wearing elaborate costumes with big platform shoes, rhinestone sunglasses and jeweled hats for their performance before Parliament and the Queen. She was not amused.
Despite getting on the nerves of many Funkeys at one point or another, everyone wants to be Deuce.
Lotus
Lotus are extremely calm & peaceful Funkeysand have an intense connection to the planet – the Great Mother Terrapin. Lotus are friends to all wildlife and have the ability to communicate with many different types of animals. Some say they can even talk to trees.
Withsuch a natural bond with the environment, it seems odd that the Lotus reside in the heart of FunkeysTown. Could this be the reason for the broken heart? Then again, maybe it is their strong bond with the environment that holds all of the Funkeys Town together.
Either way, the Lotus stay cool in all situations, even Master Lox and his evil henchmen don’t get the Lotus too worried. Their expressions never change.
Scratch
The Scratch discovered early on that they had the power of music. In the time of troubles, during the Funkey wars of the 3rd Funkazoic Era, they used this power to disable their enemies.
Masters of music, whether Techno, Hip Hop, or Rock, when the Scratch start to spin tunes, all the other Funkeysare compelled to dance. With opposing armies in a hypnotic dance trance, the Scratch were able to win many battles.
These days they use this power only for good. Known as party starters, the Scratch are always looking for things to take it to the next level. But if trouble ever returns, the Scratch could make a valuable ally… or a powerful enemy.
Twinx
Twinx means “star” in the native Funkey language, and the Twinx embody this word. They have achieved celebrity status in Terrapinia.
Like the Amazons on Earth, the Twinx are all female. But don’t let their beauty fool you. The Twinx are a strong & proud race. Legend has it that the Twinx captured all the powers of the moon and the stars in their big beautiful eyes.
The Twinxshimmer with the energy of the entire Funkey galaxy. You can see it in their captivating and hypnotic eyes. But the energy that went in can also come out. The Twinx could change the world in the blink of an eye.
Vroom
The Vroom have an instinctive love for anything fast and dangerous. Their natural mechanical skills and enthusiasm for showing off have given them the reputation of being the most daring of all of the Funkeys. The Vroomonly reinforce this reputation by constantly performing what appear to be ever increasingly dangerous feats, when in fact these stunts are carefully choreographed and practiced with safety in mind.
Most Vroom perform their stunts purely for the love of the stunt itself, and often do so before a cheering audience of their fellow Funkeys. They constructed a giant arena, called the Room De Vroom, on Laputa Station for their performances.
The Deuce work hard at being Deuce, but the Vroom are just naturally cool.
Xener
Xener means traveler in Funkey. In the late 40th century, Funkeyswere obsessed with space travel. They spent millions of coins on missions that accomplished very little. The last flight mission crashed and remains intact to remind them of this frivolous program but the Xener still believe that space travel is the final frontier.
It was the Xenerexperience with travel that helped the Guild of Master Technicians build the first portals. Their intention was to boldly go where no Funkey had gone before – the furthest reaches of space. But they found the portals ill equipped to reach that far. An unexpected benefit was using these portals for travel throughout Terrapinia.
Now the Xener spend most of their time playing space video games, honing their skills for one day, they will return to space.
Fallout
The Fallout are the mad scientists of Terrapinia. Scientists, in that they are constantly seen conducting strange experiments throughout Funkeys Town. Mad, oh yes, because Funkeys are always asking them what they are doing and interrupting their “important” work and, more notably, because their experiments rarely work.
The Boggle often follow them around eating …errr… cleaning up their messes to keep their many failed experiments from polluting the town.
It is rumored that they are experimenting with the essence of fun, but what that actually means is a mystery. It is commonly believe, and discussed, debated and deliberated, that one day the Fallout will either discover this “essence” or release something quite the opposite – a destructive substance that not even the Boggle can digest.
Glub
The Glub are extremely agile and elegant when submerged but on land are like… well, a fish out of water.
The Glub speak in a strange bubbling, slurping way that most Funkeys find difficult to understand. But oddly enough, the Glub have the most beautiful singing voices. All their speech difficulties go away when they sing. They perform in the Great Funkey Hall, always sing the Funkey anthem, “We Want the Funk”, before sporting events and, of course, at Parliament.
Despite their awkwardness on land, the Glubwaddle around with their noses in the air and act like big superstars. They are the royalty of all Funkey celebrities and they act like it.
Sprout
The Sprout are always precisely prim, particularly proper and the most purely polite of all of the Funkeys.
The Sprout have perfectly manicured lawns, elaborate gardens and showpiece homes. They are often featured in the “Funkeys Home and Garden” and “Architecturally Funkey Digest” and a Sprout has won the coveted Felix Award (given to the neatest Funkey) for as long as anyone can remember.
Most jobs around town associated with keeping things beautiful are held by Sprout. They work in concert with the Boggle to keep trash off the street although they find the Boggle to be “gross creatures.” They have a natural ability to grow any type of vegetation. If they had thumbs, they would most certainly be green!
Stitch
Funkeyfolklore reports it like this – a long time ago the Stitch were trusted with the great secret of the great King Funkankhamun of the Golden Age. It was a secret so great that it had the potential of bringing down the king, his Golden Age and maybe all of Terrapinia.
As protectors of this great secret, the Stitch kept away from most other Funkeys, spending their time lurking in graveyards, peacefully cultivating and gathering mushrooms. They were so successful in keeping this secret, that all Funkeys started entrusting their secrets to the Stitch. They would follow other Funkeys around, learn their secrets and then store them for safe keeping.
After years of this behavior, the Stitch evolved to having lips sewed shut, and an eye for danger and no heart so that they can never be tempted to tell their secrets. If what they knew got out…
Tiki
The Tiki are believed to be the first Funkeys to inhabit Terrapinia. All other Funkeys evolved from the Tiki. The first Tiki crawled out of the primordial soup and walked on land over a million years ago.
Hunters and gatherers, they quickly became the dominant species. They created a thriving society, the ruins of which can still be seen in the Mesofunkey Plains. They developed the first language, writings and were prolific artists.
Tiki artifacts are highly prized by collectors. While once fierce warriors, the Tikis now live an almost Zen-like existence and despite their ferocious look, modern Tiki are vegans.
Wasabi
Naturally stealthy and skilled in the art of Kung-Fu, the Wasabi are extremely secretive and rarely speak. Always appearing silent and composed, their aloofness is often misunderstood and sometimes feared by their fellow Funkeys.
The Wasabi do nothing to dispel this image, preferring to keep to themselves. They are in perfect harmony of mind and body. Honesty, self discipline and respectful behavior are their core values. They are often deep in meditation, studying ancient scrolls, painting and sculpting or engaged in rigorous exercises to hone their fighting skills.
Wasabi physical feats are those of legend including stories of walking up walls, on water and extended levitation. No one has ever challenged a Wasabi and lived to tell the tale.
Flurry
Originally from the shivery ice flow region, the Flurry are very cool under pressure making them the shrewdest negotiators in Terrapinia. It is said, they literally have ice water flowing through their veins. Legendary for their ability to sell anything to anyone, it is rumored that the Flurry even Flurryd butter to the Boggle.
You would think that, coming from frozen tundra, the Flurry would seek a warm sunny patch of sand to spend their vacation, but after their first visit to Funkiki Island, the Flurry had entirely different plans. They bought the highest piece of land from the local natives, for two scarves and a worn out mitten, and set about creating Mt. Carousel, Terrapinia’s premier ski resort. A Flurry spokesperson told the Funkiki Vacation Board that “they spared no expense, importing only the choicest snow, even handpicking each individual snowflake from the tallest mountain peaks throughout Terrapinia.” Whether or not that is true we’ll never know, but the Flurry are cool enough to keep snow on a tropical island year round.
Sol
Known for their optimistic outlooks and relaxed attitudes, the Sol bring a ray of sunshine into the lives of everyone they meet. When the Sol adventurer Pol-I-An-Na-Na Sol (called P-Sol by his friends) first reached Funkiki Island, he was sure that everyone would love to come to bask on the beautiful beaches and drink in the endless sunshine. Financed by the Flurry, P-Sol opened the Heck-A-Wee Resort and Spa. P-Sol also discovered on the island a turtle-like animal, called the Huh by locals, with amazing relaxation powers.
When you arrive at the resort, the Sol greet you with their sunny personality and a necklace made of Huh shells. The Huh necklace erases all your worries and concerns. P-Sol has a philosophy that continues today at the resort, that each guest should be treated as a member of the Heck-A-Wee family. The family atmosphere combined with plenty of sunshine, some tasty waves and the mind clearing power of the Huh, causes visitors to be so relaxed that they lay around the beach saying, “Huh, we’re the Heck-A-Wee” all day long. At the end of your stay, the Huh necklace is removed. Guests say they experience an intense but painless rush of memories returning to them called “Turtle recall.”
Webley
Don’t let their hairy scary appearance lead you astray, the Webley are a highly intelligent and creative tribe of legendary inventors and explorers. In fact, the Webley have patents and trademarks on more inventions and have discovered more lands than anyone else in Terrapinia. Most famous of them is the World Wide Web, invented by one particularly hairy scary Webleycalled Ali Gory. Ali was known for his wildly wicked and way out stories and tales. His World Wild Web, spun entirely by his mind, is the cornerstone of all Funkeyscommunication. Many of today’s technologies spun out from Ali’s web creation including web phones, web travel, web mail, and web voting (a particular favorite of Ali’s).
But soon after the creation of web advertising, the Webleystarted to become disillusioned with the high tech, fast paced, hustle and bustle of Funkeys Town. They sent their great explorer, Captain Brock Loosetoe, to find a remote island where the Webley could relocate, away from all technology, when he discovered Funkiki Island and its native inhabitants, he knew it was the place.
On Funkiki Island, the Webley have become outdoorsy. Using their webs as ropes, sails, and various other tools, the Webley now live a subsistent existence in an outpost deep in the jungles of FunkikiIsland. They only use natural fibers, spun by themselves, catch all their own food and have become the vocal caretakers of the planet. In order to raise funds for their cause, they conduct jungle tours, catering to only the most courageous Funkey travelers.
Nibble
The original inhabitants of Funkiki island, Nibble have a deep love and respect for the ocean. Nibble have natural affinity towards the ocean, preferring to spend more time at sea then on land. In fact, they spend so much time in the water, they have permanent swimmers ear. Their scary, chomping appearence is less about eating, and more about clearing their ears.
Cannonball Taylor
Two time Funkey Grand Prix Champion and Captain of the Royalton Racing Team, Cannonball is one of the Funkeys Racing League’s most famous drivers.
Cannonball is constantly being followed by packs of devoted Funkey fans, and truly enjoys the celebrity status he has earned through racing. Catch him on a good day and he might just sign an autograph for a fan or two, but don’t be fooled by his polished smile! He may give you an autograph, but when on the race track, winning is all that matters! Well, that and fame!
When not racing, Cannonball spends most of his time lounging in the swanky “Driver’s Club” of the Royalton Industries Building. It’s not uncommon to find Cannonball polishing his pair of Grand Prix Champion Diamond or showing off his collection of racing trophies.
Chim-Chim
This candy loving primate is well known around all of the racing tracks of the Funkeys Racing League and is considered Terrapinnia most “Funkey Monkey”. Officially a member of Racer Family Team, Chim-Chim can usually be found getting into trouble throughout the Royalton Racing Complex.
The constant companion of Speed Racer’s little brother Spritle, Chim-Chimis truly a member of the Racer family. If you mess with the Racers, you’re sure to get a face full of monkey cookies as Chim-Chim pops up from one of his favorite hiding spaces to save the day… and the race.
Racer X
Funkeys Racing League’s most mysterious driver, little is known about the masked Funkey known as Racer X. Who is the Funkey behind the mask? Where did he come from? Where is he heading (other then than the finish line)?
Although his past is shrouded in secrecy, his skill as a racer is there for all to see with velocity unmatched by all but the greatest racers in the League. It is possible that you could blink and miss him as he races by. However, as anyone who has the chance to watch a race will attest, there’s no missing the sonic boom of his engines s he screams down the track.
Both feared and revered, Racer X has earned the nickname “Harbinger of Boom”. It is said that if Racer X is in a race, the crowd is guaranteed to see some truly spectacular crashes! Racer X is Funkeys Racing League’s biggest wild card.
Snake Oiler
Racing for the Hydrocell Team, Snake Oiler is one of the League’s most dubious characters. Known to be unstable (and some even say “crazy”), this is definitely one slippery character that you don’t want to messsssss with!
Although the officials of the Funkeys Racing League have yet to be able to prove any foul-play, Snake has earned the reputation of being one of the League’s most notorious cheaters. Cold blooded like a serpent, Snake coils and strikes his opponents without hesitation or remorse.
Like all villains, despite all his foul venom, Snake is truly a cowardly driver. When confronted withan opponent with real racing skills such as Speed Racer or the mysterious Racer X , rather than rise to the challenge, he’ll find a way to cheat his way through it. Maybe this is why he has never once qualified for the Funkey Grand Prix.
Speed Racer
As a member of the Racer Family, Speed has been raised to drive from a very young age. It’s been said that Speed was tooling timing pins while still in his Funkey diapers.
Speed Racer is truly a gifted driver, who grew up watching his legendary older brother, Rex Racer, set records in all of the major racing events throughout Terrapinnia. Speed was taught by his brother to “listen to what the car wants” rather than simply drive.
Choosing to stay un-sponsored and never driving without wearing his lucky red socks, Speed has vowed to carry on his brother’s mission; to challenge the corruption rampant throughout the FRL, and restore the purity to the sport!
Although a relative new professional driver in the Funkeys Racing League, Speed is carrying on his family legacy and quickly becoming the crowd favorite.
As the Mach 6 engines roars around the track and equally deafening roar of “Go, Speed Go” can be heard from his cheering Funkey fans!
Trixie
The first lady of fast, Trixie is not just Speed Racer’s girlfriend; she may just be racing’s biggest fan. Trixie may not be a professional racer, but growing up with the Racer family, racing is in her blood! Never backing down in the face of danger, Trixie is a confident Funkey who is unafraid to take on the world.
As Speed Racer’s main squeeze, Trixie is always ready to aid Speed in times of crisis! Whether performing search-and-rescue missions or scouting out Speed Racer’s opponents on the track, Trixie always happens to arrive in the nick of time in her custom helicopter.
Taejo
The son of Tetsua Togokahn, owner of Togokahn Motors, Taejo races not only for his team, but also for the glory of his family! Although he is a member of the Togokahn Clan, Taejo has earned his position as the captain of the Togokahn Motors Racing Team through his incredible racing skills and fearless attitude.
As a profitable company, Togokahn Motors is always in danger of a corporate takeover from greedy companies like Royalton Industries. Taejo has vowed to keep his father’s company in the family and drives each race as if the company is at stake!
This single minded dedication to his family sometimes blurs the lines between good and bad when it comes to Taejo’s motives. You never know if he is your friend or has alternative motives.
Berger
While the Boggle are famous for their butter, the Berger are famous for their cheese! The Berger are master cheese smiths, and have perfected thousands of recipes for creating some quite interesting cheese combinations.
True Funkey food connoisseurs love to attend the Berger’s famous cheese tasting parties where they can debate the merits of each variety of cheese. Does the Triple-Dipple Funkberry Gouda taste better with a glass of fresh Bumblejuice, or is it the not so subtle taster explosion of a dirty Berger cheddar platter more appropriate? It’s all just a matter of taste!
The Berger have a real sense of their history. Their ancient king is preserved in a kind of plastic coating and on the display in the great Berger hall. He is a real tourist draw, attracting many visitors each day. Some find him majestic, others a bit creepy as he stares out at you with plastic eyes.
Not only do the Berger create the most delicious varieties of cheese throughout Terrapinia, they are also the cheesiest when it comes to conversation! The Berger are notorious braggarts, particularly about their cheeses, and always seem to have an obvious and artless way of making a point. They have a very effected way of speaking that makes even their most casual statements sound like conceit. “I’m’ soooooo happy to see you” or “please moooooove your car” come off quite arrogant. Despite this, deep down the Berger are truly good natured Funkeys
Drift
The Drift feel the need… the need for speed! The drift do everything fast. They walk fast, drive fast, and even talk fast. The Drift talk in their special drift language as rapidly as they possibly can! They talk so fast that the term “motor mouth” was coined to describe anyone who is talking too quickly to understand what it is they are saying! Also when someone is having trouble being understood they say, “Do you catch my drift?”
The Drift have gifted talent for anything mechanical, and are constantly tinkering with things in order to make them faster. The drift are always designing and building faster and faster vehicles, and they will spend days making slight yet precise adjustments to their creations in order to get even the littlest amount of additional speed.
This mechanical talent and love of fast things makes the drift the best friends of vroom. the drift are always making modification to vroom stunt vehicles in order to make them faster and able to jump larger and more dangerous stunts. The Vroom, in turn, tests all the new crazy fast vehicle designs that the drift can think of… Sometimes with spectacular results.
Dyer
Legend tells of a young boy, a shepherd named dyer who was a notorious prankster, and of a gullible wolf who loved to play cards. The boy would call the wolf over and bet that he could guess what card the wolf would draw from the deck of cards. They would cut the deck, draw the card and the boy always guessed right. On day, the wolf checked the cards and found they were all the same. The boy barely escaped with his life.
The boy learned his lesson and vowed never to take advantage of another being again; to live a life of peace and harmony with all living creatures. They even befriended the Kootie, a small bug that lives on the skin of Funkeys. The Dyer realized that use of soap was killing the poor Kooties so they stopped washing and using soap.
The Dyer are found sleeping, or as they call it “extended deep thought sessions”. The Dyer like to participate in these “deep though session” in large groups, and it is not uncommon to find large groups of dyer just lying around parks, on the beach, or on campuses of our lucky lady and usc. Rather than speak, the Dyer write down their thoughts on small plastic discs and throw them back and forth to each other. They even developed a mass communication method where many Dyers run around chucking the message disk back and forth. They say it is the ultimate but it is yet to catch on.
Lucky
There’s an old saying “I’d rather be lucky than good.” and nobody is more lucky than the Lucky, that is why, of course, they are called the Lucky.
Many, many years ago, the lucky discovered, quite by accident, the secret to controlling all the rainbows in Terrapinia. The first thing they did with the skill was use it to find the pot of coins that everyone knows is at the end of rainbows. Since they have so many coins, they’ve never again had to work a day in their life! Because of this, the Lucky are always friendly and have a permanently sunny disposition, even when it’s raining.
While the Snipe will always aggressively assert that they are the roughest, and the Wasabi may be legendary for their stealthy funk-fu powers, everybody really know that the Lucky are the toughest of all Funkeys! Being the toughest of all Funkeys around, the Lucky really don’t feel any need to prove their toughness to anyone!
Not feeling a need to brag about their toughness, the Lucky instead pride themselves on their education level. Frequently telling others how book smart they are. They spend considerable time keeping their minds healthy by planning challenging puzzles and word games. The Lucky have been established a very prestigious college called out Lucky Lady University as a rival school to the Waggs’ university of soft and cuddly. Not only is it one of the finest academic schools in Terrapinia. It is also consistently has one of the best Bowball teams throughout the land. LLU’s current head mistress lucky d is not only one of the smartest Funkeys in the land. She is also one of the prettiest . . . and of course, the luckiest.
Snipe
If you ask a snipe, they will gladly tell you that the snipe are the best trained, best equipped, toughest, fastest, meanest and most humble members of the Funkeys armed recon stealth elites. Of course that’s because only snipe are allowed to join the F.A.R.C.E!
While it is typically the Webley explorers that will discover new lands on Terrapinia (and beyond), it is always an elite group of snipe that will be next sent to the newly discovered territory. Being uniquely suited to sneak around without being detected, it’s the job of F.A.R.C.E. to perform stealth reconnaissance on any new territory, scout out and deal with any potential danger, and make sure that everything is safe for future Funkeys travelers.
The Snipe pride themselves on their extensive training regiments and their military discipline. The distinguished F.A.R.C.E. leader, general Key-Oki expects his troops to always be ready for new and dangerous missions, general Key-Oki, keeps the snipe commandos in constant training exercises so that they will be prepared to deploy at a moment’s notice! Because of this constant training, these groups of snipe become like brothers.
Spending so much time crawling thru high grass and running training mission deep into the bush, has led the snipe to be given the nickname “the Bush Brothers.” most enlightened Funkeys equate the words Bush with F.A.R.C.E. however most Funkeys also say, “may the F.A.R.C.E. be with you….because you certainly don’t want them against you!”
More of the Codex coming soon!
